it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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