thus making me awesome and them whores
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
