i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize