My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
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