he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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