I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize
