You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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