I must be too annoying 4 u.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
