I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
