I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize