I bet he comes in French.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
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