i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
