he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
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