Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize