How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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