it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
She said her name was "party"
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
