Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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