They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
