I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize
