GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
