I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
we should paint friendship bongs
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