In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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