His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
