found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
