Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Randomize
