ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
