my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
