You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
