Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Randomize
