idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
