Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
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