At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
organizing the empties. That sober.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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