i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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