Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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