He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I will pee on everything he values.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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