It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Randomize
