porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
