i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Randomize
