I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Randomize
