He is an equal opportunity slut.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
