yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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