check it out our google latitudes are spooning
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
