Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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