just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Bang-toberfest begins!!
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
My breasts were aching with rage.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize