i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Randomize
