you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
It was like giving head to a cactus.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
