I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
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