I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
