We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
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