Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
